In The Realm of the “Poor”: The Poor Chronicles Online (L-O-N-G)

From the “Whatever” blog, a classic example of the misconceptions some of us labor under when we struggle to define "poor":

Being poor is knowing exactly how much everything costs.

No—being FRUGAL is knowing exactly how much everything costs, snd how to budget for it.

Being poor is getting angry at your kids for asking for all the crap they see on TV.

No—being poor is having NO TV at all.

Being poor is having to keep buying $800 cars because they're what you can afford, and then having the cars break down on you, because there's not an $800 car in America that's worth a damn.

No—being poor is riding the bus or walking because you can’t even afford the $800 car.

Being poor is hoping the toothache goes away.

No—being poor is stealing the bottle of aspirin because you know that’s what makes the pain go away.

Being poor is knowing your kid goes to friends' houses but never has friends over to yours.

No—that’s being embarrassed about what you might find when you get home.

Being poor is going to the restroom before you get in the school lunch line so your friends will be ahead of you and won't hear you say "I get free lunch" when you get to the cashier.

No—there are so many who get free lunch that few kids worry about this. This is being self-conscious.

Being poor is living next to the freeway.

No—being poor is living ON the freeway, specifically under an overpass.

Being poor is coming back to the car with your children in the back seat, clutching that box of Raisin Bran you just bought and trying to think of a way to make the kids understand that the box has to last.

No—being poor means not having a car or box of Raisin Bran in your life.

Being poor is wondering if your well-off sibling is lying when he says he doesn't mind when you ask for help.

No—being poor is not caring and asking anyway, because you have nothing left to lose.

Being poor is off-brand toys.

No-being poor is hand-me-down toys from neighbors and friends, regardless of brand.

Being poor is a heater in only one room of the house.

No—being poor is no heater at all, but maybe an open fire pit somewhere outdoors.

Being poor is knowing you can't leave $5 on the coffee table when your friends are around.

No—this is ludicrous. Nobody does that!

Being poor is hoping your kids don't have a growth spurt.

No—being poor is hoping your kids hurry and grow into working age, so they can help pay some bills.

Being poor is stealing meat from the store, frying it up before your mom gets home and then telling her she doesn't have make dinner tonight because you're not hungry anyway.

Yeah, okay—I’ll buy this one.

Being poor is Goodwill underwear.

No—being poor is no underwear at all, or worse—having to wear your opposite gender hand-me-downs.

Being poor is not enough space for everyone who lives with you.

No—this is over-breeding.

Being poor is feeling the glued soles tear off your supermarket shoes when you run around the playground.

Yeah, I’ll go with this one too.

Being poor is your kid's school being the one with the 15-year-old textbooks and no air conditioning.

No—that’s the poor SCHOOL, no the kid. BTW, there are schools in middle-class areas in the same shape.

Being poor is thinking $8 an hour is a really good deal.

No—that’s thinking desperate. Unskilled labor is overpaid.

Being poor is relying on people who don't give a damn about you.

No—that’s being normal. We ALL rely on people who don’t give a damn about us…witness the store clerk, the banker, the doctor.

Being poor is an overnight shift under florescent lights.

No—this is a shift choice, and lots of people work overnights.

Being poor is finding the letter your mom wrote to your dad, begging him for the child support.

No—this is being nosy.

Being poor is a bathtub you have to empty into the toilet.

No—this is not paying your water bill, or having defective plumbing.

Being poor is stopping the car to take a lamp from a stranger's trash.

No—this is curbside shopping, and lots of people do this who aren’t poor.

Being poor is making lunch for your kid when a cockroach skitters over the bread, and you looking over to see if your kid saw.

No—this is living in cockroach country. Texans and Floridians do it all the time.

Being poor is believing a GED actually makes a goddamned difference.

No—this is KNOWING a GED is the basic educational level sought by society for menial labor.

Being poor is people angry at you just for walking around in the mall.

No—this is self-consciousness…again. Nobody gets angry at you for walking around in malls.

Being poor is not taking the job because you can't find someone you trust to watch your kids.

No—this is choice. You chose your kids’ security over employment.

Being poor is the police busting into the apartment right next to yours.

No—this happens to a lot of us. Police bust in where they need to.

Being poor is not talking to that girl because she'll probably just laugh at your clothes.

No—this is self-consciousness…yet again.

Being poor is hoping you'll be invited for dinner.

No—being poor means being without hope at all.

Being poor is a sidewalk with lots of brown glass on it.

No—that’s litter.

Being poor is people thinking they know something about you by the way you talk.

No—that’s common, ordinary judgment call, and everybody makes them.

Being poor is needing that 35-cent raise.

No—everybody could use a raise.

Being poor is your kid's teacher assuming you don't have any books in your home.

No—that’s poor judgment on the part of your teacher. Public libraries are full of books, and that could be where you keep yours.

Being poor is six dollars short on the utility bill and no way to close the gap.

No—that’s being broke because of bad budgeting skills. You send them the money anyway.

Being poor is crying when you drop the mac and cheese on the floor.

No—being poor is using the five-second rule and serving it anyway.

Being poor is knowing you work as hard as anyone, anywhere.

No—this is not having to knowledge to leverage your skills and talents into a better-paying job.

Being poor is people surprised to discover you're not actually stupid.

No—this is judgment again. There are plenty of wolves in sheep’s clothing around.

Being poor is people surprised to discover you're not actually lazy.

No—you’re mixing up judgment calls with self-consciousness again.

Being poor is a six-hour wait in an emergency room with a sick child asleep on your lap.

No—a six-hour wait is nothing! Try 14 hours of agonizing pain from pancreatic cancer because your morphine isn't doing the trick any more.

Being poor is never buying anything someone else hasn't bought first.

No—that’s being smart with your money.

Being poor is picking the 10 cent ramen instead of the 12 cent ramen because that's two extra packages for every dollar.

No—again, that’s being smart with your money.

Being poor is having to live with choices you didn't know you made when you were 14 years old.

No—we all have to do that.

Being poor is getting tired of people wanting you to be grateful.

No—everybody wants you to be grateful, regardless of socio-economic level.

Being poor is knowing you're being judged.

No—we’re ALL constantly being judged.

Being poor is a box of crayons and a $1 coloring book from a community center Santa.

No—being poor means no Santa, coloring book, or crayons at all!

Being poor is checking the coin return slot of every soda machine you go by.

No—that’s being prudent. Lots of people do this.

Being poor is deciding that it's all right to base a relationship on shelter.

No—you’ve made this a priority.

Being poor is knowing you really shouldn't spend that buck on a Lotto ticket.

No—lots of us shouldn’t spend money on Lotto, but we do for hope.

Being poor is hoping the register lady will spot you the dime.

No—people all over are generous for a variety of reasons.

Being poor is feeling helpless when your child makes the same mistakes you did, and won't listen to you beg them against doing so.

No—everybody who’s had kids shares this problem.

Being poor is a cough that doesn't go away.

No—a cough that doesn’t go away is an undiagnosed problem that a Medicare hospital can take care of for free.

Being poor is making sure you don't spill on the couch, just in case you have to give it back before the lease is up.

If you can afford to lease a couch, you aren't poor. Homemade couches out of boards, pillows, and cement blocks exist for free.

Being poor is a $200 paycheck advance from a company that takes $250 when the paycheck comes in.

No—that’s being stupid with your money because you don’t know any better.

Being poor is four years of night classes for an Associates of Art degree.

No—being employed full-time elsewhere also slows down your education.

Being poor is a lumpy futon bed.

No—being poor is NO bed at all.

Being poor is knowing where the shelter is.

No—being smart is knowing where the shelter is. Anyone with a phonebook, a map, and a car that’s driven by the place also knows where the shelter is.

Being poor is people who have never been poor wondering why you choose to be so.

No—we don’t wonder. We know why--it's effortless.

Being poor is knowing how hard it is to stop being poor.

No—with a little education and some elbow grease and courage, you too can escape the poverty trap.

Being poor is seeing how few options you have.

No—being poor is seeing how many options you have to escape, and not uising any of them.

Being poor is running in place.

No—at least you can run.

Being poor is people wondering why you didn't leave.

No—being poor shows us that you haven’t found the door out yet.

Try explaining ANY of this to a barefoot, ground-sleeping, tattered rag-wearing Third World country inhabitant who eats once a week (if that)--even the circumstances of supermarket shoes, lumpy futon mattresses, and Goodwill underwear would seem like absolute luxury in comparison!