Green is Making Me See Red (L-O-N-G)

Yeah okay, the Dems took back Congress, but their environmental fanaticism is almost as bad as Islamic Shari’a Law: my way or the highway.

I'll take the highway for $200, Alex.

Everyone from Nancy Pelosi and Charlie Rangel right down to Ed Begley Jr. believes their way IS the right way, and that we ought to spend our way out of a conundrum caused by lack of a decent energy policy—something neither I nor Ed Begley can do anything about.

Now I know why ol’ Ed hasn’t been on TV or in the movies lately—it takes all his energy to run his jury-rigged home. His “new” career has become pedaling for toast on his veranda.

On every channel, in every format, people are making appearances trying to bolster the use of “clean energy” and conservation, pushing conversion to alternative power all the while. They also manage to push INVESTING in these companies to help make the costs for conversion and purchase come down. Isn’t that putting the cart before the horse?

The worst offenders: the scientific community. In order to preserve research funding, the scientists who previously came out AGAINST "global warming" have had to change their tune, especially meteorologists--they are under threat of losing accreditation if they dare to disagree with Dr. Heidi Cullen, head of the American Meteorological Society and a firm believer in human activity as THE culprit (talk about blackmail!). If these guys want to keep their jobs, and keep doing research, then they have to tow the party line...for now.

In reality, it's a shift in the magnetic field that is causing all this weird weather--no amount of environmental restrictions or dogma-swaying is going to change it. Man has never experienced it before, since the last shift happened before we were upright.

As we pretty much know, I’ve railed in the past about how this is all a fluke, a pipe dream, and another Liberal-backed fund raiser in the guise of Utopian living goals. The costs outweigh the benefits, the tax benefits are few and far between (not to mention quickly dwindling), and there is little to no return on investment for a good long time. One size does not fit all situations here.

Environmental zealots seem to think we all share the same living conditions, the same income, the same disposable income level, and that everyone is fit and well enough to do things like climb onto the roof and install solar panels. Judging by the number of motorized wheelchair commercials flooding the airways, I’d say a good number of us are no longer bipeds—or at the very least, dealing with our diabetes from the back of a horse!

If you’re 20-to-30-something and have the spare money, time, property ownership, capability, and desire to make all these conversions to solar, wind, geothermal, fuel cell, etc., then you go right ahead. The rest of us will take the common sense way and unplug a few things instead.

We smart ones will reduce our driving as conditions dictate, keep our cars well-maintained, live in smaller homes, carefully scrutinize energy-consuming purchases such as appliances, maintain our homes and yards to use less resources, watch our trash generation, watch our consumption, and compare light bulbs at the hardware store for energy output vs. input. Oh yeah—and we’ll be sure to sleep at night. Our conscience will be clear, I assure you.

You, on the other hand, will most likely have to make some major adjustments in the ways you carry out your Utopian dream lifestyle when you lose your job, marry a non-green spouse, have non-green children, pollute the landscape with your non-green disposable diapers, plastic oversized Fisher-Price toys, and cart the family around in your non-green station wagon…oops, I mean SUV. Later, you’ll fall off your roof from trying to install those solar panels yourself to save money, only to break your back and end up in a motorized wheelchair for the rest of your life. Eventually, Wilford Brimley will become your TV pal, and you’ll end up right back where you started. Oh, and somewhere in there you'll have been transferred to an office clear across the country, and nobody wants to buy your contraption-laden house, which actually LOST market value over time compared to your next-door neighbor's.

To Ed: instead of pedaling to toast your bread, why not just give up bread altogether? Man does not need bread to survive. That rain barrel you installed at the end of your gutter becomes totally unnecessary when you landscape your yard with drought-tolerant plants so the rain can do the job for you. Maybe then you'd have time to go pursue acting jobs--your consumption has clearly shifted from "needs" to "wants" and for the wrong reasons. You're like the Al Gore of conservationists--he has 4 homes and 3 cars, none of which is energy-conscious in any way.

Wouldn’t it have been easier to just bend over and pull the plug on something, or adjust your driving habits, or just make small changes at home, instead of trying to conquer the world and force it into the Shari’a law of liberal environmentalism?

People, if you want MORE of something, try doing LESS of something else. More money comes from less spending, more cooperation comes from less brow-beating, and more faith in your fellow man means less tossing and turning over the planet at night.

We are all aware that there are problems, and we are doing things that you cannot see. There may not be solar panels on the roof, windmills in the backyard, hybrid cars in the driveway, or bike-powered toasters on our balconies, but there are more new trees on our properties, there’s less trash and more recycling bins on the curb, and energy-efficient appliances, bulbs, and thermostats in our homes. There’s also a copy of the bus schedule in some wallets and purses.

Other than that, all I have to say to these zealots is to shut up and plant some more trees. I’m not shelling out for things I cannot use in my everyday life, things I cannot alter, and things I have no control over. The planet will still be here as long as we quit mowing down Mother Nature’s air scrubbers—there’s no need to spend $40,000 to buy salvation on the roads (via a Toyota Pretentious), or $25,000 to erect a single plastic panel shrine to the sun gods, both of which TAKE oil to produce. Exactly where are the savings, especially when the average length of ownership for both items is around 7 years? You can't recoup much return in that amount of time.

And someone please tell me what it is we’re supposed to be saving for? Where WE conserve, China and India only CONSUME, and in greater quantities. How soon we forget that we’re #3 on the oil consumption list, behind India and China. There is such a thing as PLANETARY BALANCE, is there not? I’d really like to know when it kicks in!

I sit here and smirk as California takes more and more drastic steps to clean up air that the jet stream blows in from over-polluted China. I also sit here and smirk as I remember that Italy still sells leaded regular gas, and that the air over there wasn’t even CLOSE to being clean—and this is in liberal Europe.

Environmentalists: do yourselves a favor and get out of your own county once in a while! Stop living in a vacuum and see how others live and conserve—it’s not always necessary to enforce the Shari’a Law of your ideals. Wake up, grow up, and face reality--don YOUR OWN burkhas for a change!

If you need a target, why not try Gene Simmons? He has a great big sprawling mansion for 4 people--talk about a monument to ego!