Dispatch from Seat #29 of the Paranoia Express (Super L-O-N-G)

The education/employment picture: White collar jobs will continue to go to India, China, or robots/software, high-paying (and dependable) jobs in the service sector will go to illegal immigrants (who will have been made legal by politics), and the only so-called high-paying white-collar jobs left to us will be in politics, lobbying, and the military upper ranks—illegals-made-legal will fill the military rank and file (we always need more cannon fodder)so we may continue going to war for resources (oil, people, food, you name it). Even Wall St. is getting gutted from the inside out: brokers are being replaced by technology, and firms are bankrupting themselves trying to reach for more profits despite the risk level. Paying for college will become futile at best until a Democratic/Socialist congress finishes the playing field-leveling job, creating a whole new CETA jobs generation (this is what got the hippies out of the woods and off the streets back in the 70's). Big molly-coddling government will be back with a vengeance!

U.S. News and World Report is telling us the some pretty astonishing things about education and future employment: college grads should look toward blue-collar work that’s dependable and steady, and can’t be farmed out to outsourcing, off-shoring, or technology. I said this very same thing back in 2005, only I carried it a bit further: I questioned the need for a degree at all when the steady jobs won’t need that level of education. I also threw in one more little ditty: since we seek high-paying jobs, then work our patooteys off just to afford a mortgage, what if we were to get the house FIRST? Assuming we all could inherit our abodes, we wouldn’t have to make so much money just to pay expenses—eliminating the need for high education levels, high income levels, and the high job loss risk inherent at those levels.

Amish living, here we come! Good thing they’re still around to show us how to survive in the coming downturn.

We will be China-izing again, thanks to the desperation of business: radically lowering standards of designing, manufacturing, and employee/consumer/environmental safety. Stafford Shirts will be the new Triangle Shirtwaist Company disaster of our time. Ralph Nader and unions may once again have careers ahead of them, if only Ralph could live long enough to see it—maybe he could train his grandchildren how to fight and mop up after bad political and business decisions the way he did for us back in the 60's and 70's.

Our prisons and jails are the new U.S. sweatshops. What’s cheaper than a .30/hour worker that lives on the premises, needs no benefits, and is part of an ever-increasing population? People will be committing crimes just to get fed, housed, clothed, and employed in the years ahead out of sheer desperation, because social programs will no longer pick up their slack.

On the political front: Democrats will either take the presidency or fill both sides of Congress—we won’t be able to escape them. Too many “losers” (job, house, health care, etc.) will use their voting power to reinstate the safety net they so desire. All our taxes will be raised 2-4 times what they are right now—there is behind-the-scenes talk of doubling our income taxes as we speak, and the minimum wage will have to rise again (whispers of $10+/hour) to offset it. As a result, more and more of us will become landlords (PASSIVE income, subject to lower taxes) to both take advantage of plummeting home prices/mortgage rates, and escape the ACTIVE income taxes of a job.

More people will be running to the shelter of public subsidy programs, only to find them more restrictive than today, and even phasing out altogether—government wants to spend your money, but not on you. They only want to do enough to keep the slaves, I mean workers, in the fields (so to speak)—this means bare minimums in food, medical care, and possible transportation subsidies (bus passes), but nothing else. You will be expected to work at something for the rest, even if it’s a $10/hour job at Mickey D’s with an 80% total tax rate. You heard the term “Uncle Sam’s plantation”? This is it.

Congress-critters may come to realize what an egregious error they made in creating this corn-for-fuel scheme, and begin undoing it (when they themselves have trouble affording meat). Somewhere down the road someone will have exposed the REAL agenda behind this whole ethanol thing, and it isn’t about oil: the eco-weenie liberals want to create a vegetarian world. They’re convinced that cow flatulence and humans are the major causes of greenhouse gases, the leading cause of global warming—never mind the fact that there’s global warming on Mars and Neptune, where cow and man doesn’t exist. Also, never mind the fact that meat is the only meaningful protein source that isn’t allergenic—soy, nuts, and dairy are all problematic for much of the population. But then, it plays right into their “no human allowed” game…no humans except themselves, of course.

Hypocrisy will continue to play a huge role for time immemorial. Yet another conservative uprising will occur in a few years—this time, getting back to the FISCAL roots of conservancy, not so much the SOCIAL ones we have now. Much of our religiously-fervent will die off, leaving moderates, a small handful of fundy-loonies, and a whole lot of Atheists. The older we get, the more we will turn to church—the OTHER safety net, and the only one anybody can afford. A collection plate contribution will seem a bargain for the services rendered—compare that to the taxes/social services scenario. Communal living will fit the bill for non-believers.

Our northern and southern borders will continue to be politically-obstructed from fence-building, because Uncle Sam WANTS those illegals here--for Social Security salvation, military numbers salvation, and economic consumer/spender salvation for the entire North American continent, not to mention filling pews and collection plates for the churches (the new safety nets). Our capitalist bubble, which has been building since the depression of the 30's, is now collapsing—everything old will be new again. We will be reliving our grandparents' and great-grandparents' lives through new eyes and with modern trappings (think Dust Bowl and Depression, only with granite countertops).

Everything old will HAVE TO BE new again, because we ran out of ideas about 10 years ago—we even wore out the term “retro.” If you want a better look at what this future life will entail, look to Europe--what they make now is for EXPORT. Those Euro-style things we keep falling for here in kitchen, bath, and general home items only exist for sale, not in their own homes (I lived in Italy, and know this personally). A trashcan is a trashcan, right, so why bother with fanciful aesthetics? Because that’s what sells.

We were the only country left with a middle class, and now even that's being exported to China, India, and Russia. What's worse than that, however, is the fact that China is still a Communist country (and Russia may as well still be one) operating with a capitalist economy--how long will it take us to try THAT one? In my mind, it's already starting: FISA laws, excess political secrecy, shadow governments, one-man think tanks like Robert Pastor, and the inept-appearing congress stalling on the border fences. If you want to read more on Robert Pastor, please see the last chapter of Glenn Beck's new book.

When you add up the FEMA fiascos of New Orleans, Texas, and Florida, and combine them with illegal immigration and drug trafficking, you get what appears to be a large-scale version of Amsterdam back in the 80's—the drug use freedom center of the world. Drugs were legal, drug USE was legal, and they eventually had to restrict it to one city park. All those druggies crammed into one park, free to use to their hearts' content until they overdosed and died--they weren't allowed to leave the park once they entered. Each day, ambulances would go to the park and carry out the dead. After a few years, Amsterdam was cleaned out, and new laws were enacted to curb drug use, effectively shutting the doors to drug rats. Now, substitute our long-time welfare-dependent citizens for the druggies of Amsterdam…we're replacing our crop of generational welfare rats (that didn’t swept away with Bill Clinton’s welfare reform) with new imported versions--models with a work ethic. Meanwhile, we will keep tightening eligibility restrictions and restricting enrollment on the welfare programs to curb dependency.

Ever wonder why New Orleans and all the recent U.S disaster areas haven't been rebuilt in a speedy manner like Mississippi? Someone's trying to clean out the non-economically-viable rats from the ship. Think of FEMA as an exterminator, not a disaster agency. The more you contribute to the tax coffers, the faster and better the FEMA response will be—witness the responses to the Hollywood (celebrity homes) wildfires, the south Florida (celebrity vacation homes) hurricanes and floods, and anywhere there isn’t a large demographic of welfare-dependent residents. Mississippi didn’t have a large welfare population, and was largely supported by casino profits. Casino profits = tax revenues.

We all can be replaced—especially the least productive of us, from the welfare queens to striking writers. Speaking of which, the writers will either be forced back to work (with no new contract, out of desperation), or be replaced by non-union staff—while picketing, they’ve already lost more in wages than they would ever hope to receive from future internet royalties. A futile effort at union effectiveness, don’t you think? I guess they didn’t count on the power of reruns and the internet as diversions.

This is where the impending and burgeoning Socialism of the Democratic Party plays a role in our future, even if we grudgingly accept it. If you want to get started on indentured servitude now, go ahead and vote for Hillary and her ilk. Otherwise, if you still have spine, testicles, and fight left in you to do things yourself on your own dime, bite the bullet in the voting booth. Every election, it comes down to voting for either a turd sandwich or a giant douche (just like South Park says)--pick your poison and be willing to live with the consequences. These things will probably happen no matter who gets voted into office.

FWIW, I don't think the impending Socialist bent will last--remember, we managed to wrestle our way out of the Democrat's political power grip before, and we'll do it again just as soon as our great-grandchildren and very young immigrants learn the value of a dollar (or rather Amero) and desire to hang onto more of them. In the meantime, we will have abdicated all we have left to abdicate: our free will and our rights. Socialism has never lasted anywhere it took hold, and it won’t here either. Too many of us will know better by then.

Our borders shall remain open so those being expelled from our society have somewhere else to go, and both options (Canada and Mexico) are states with abundant safety nets. As soon as the illegals are made legal, and our generational welfare rats have scurried off to new homes north or south of the border, many doors will shut behind them: welfare, Social Security, food stamps, and all other forms of human subsidies. The New Deal will become No Deal—at least for the “new” rats. Our new set of welfare queens will come from the grandchildren of Boomers—those who’d rather picket, protest, and panhandle rather than do an honest day’s work. What else can we expect from children and grandchildren of protesters, except to hand down that family tradition of making waves, no matter how absurd?

Moving on: Castro has supposedly “retired”, and mentions replacement by a younger party member—and it ain’t his slightly younger brother Raoul. Most likely, it’s going to be Chavez, who’s used his own country for OJT. Since his fellow countrymen voted him down as Dictator-for-Life, he has to leave office when his term expires, and I’m sure he wants to go somewhere friendlier to his ideas and methods—where else but Cuba? Once he’s gone, the rest of the SPP plan will go forward, because he was the only major sticking point stopping it—we already have trade agreements with nearly all the other countries in South America, and are working on the drug exporter countries in Central America.

China already has port access in Mexico, so shipments can avoid the scrutiny we fight so hard to get in place at the border, in spite of Homeland Security’s foot-dragging—this is all part of that open borders thing. Now China can ship to Mexico, and trucks can take cargo all the way up the proposed NAFTA/I-35 (Mexico to Canada) with very little interference. Yippee—more lead and mercury for everyone, not to mention the possibility of terrorist activities! And to think we can’t board a plane without x-ray scrutiny…(sigh).

Our own elites are witnessing and yearning for a China-style eco-political system: an iron hand over the people, but a free hand over commerce. That’s what gives power to all—the leader and the people, but not the people over the leader. We’ve already been rendered too stupid to vote our way out of a wet paper bag, so the elites have engineered a whole new system to rule us over our heads and behind closed doors. China has it, as does Russia, and both leaders have one thing in common: a craving for power. Cheney and Rumsfeld have it too, but couldn’t remake the successes they accomplished back in Nixon’s realm—to create so much fear and loathing that we sheep just turn over our keys (along with our privacy rights) and let them drive. The comparisons of Vietnam and Iraq are more accurate than you know in terms of the politics and goings-on behind the scenes. Look at what they created over Saddam Hussein, Iran, and nukes when our own intelligence says the whole thing was ceased three years ago.

How many troops died so Cheney and Rumsfeld could peek at our phone records unannounced and apprehend us without cause? We’re still feeling the effects every time we go to the airport—we practically have to file a flight plan with Darth Vader himself before showing up for our public frisking! They want to know about OUR goings-on in x-ray detail, but care nothing about imported goods or illegals flowing into this country by the boat-load. FISA was their political wet dream, and it will die from exposure to UV rays.

Meanwhile, we’re left with the residue of 9/11: color-coded threat levels, plastic sheets, and duct tape. Al-Qaeda is a weak sister and will never make it over here in meaningful numbers. They’re too busy blowing up their own people over their own power grab—they didn’t count on the rest of us being so vigilant. We took their power away by not being afraid, on both a military and personal level. We will do the same here at home over FISA and Homeland Security.

On the environmental front: we will have been gagging on the global warming thing for years now, and it’s always going to be nothing more than a clever marketing ploy. One solution to the we-buy-oil, we-go-to-war, we-finance-our-own-enemies circle is alcohol-based fuels—they aren’t any more efficient than ethanol, but methanol in particular can be made from the fermentation of just about anything: trash, yard waste, crop waste, coal, refinery waste and by-products, you name it. Our own city dumps have the potential to become our next gas stations, and states could own the fuel sales just like they now (in large part) own booze and tobacco sales. The dumps already sort and recycle, so what’s another (profitable) way to dispose of the indisposable besides burning and burying? It’s another source of revenue for the city, state or region, and it gets us off the OPEC treadmill. Once we get our energy stuff together, the price of oil may once again plummet to below $70/barrel or lower. All we need is about $150 worth of flex-fuel conversion work done to our existing cars to handle the new fuel OR the old gasoline—flex-fuel cars run both. All that needs to be changed is the gas line and the ignition, and these things can be done today in preparation. For optimal conversion, a larger gas tank will have to be installed, because more alcohol-based fuel will be needed to obtain the same MPG that you get now, but the air will be cleaner, and oil spills will be a thing of the past (alcohol evaporates into the air).

Funny how nobody has put the hole in our ozone together with global cooling, isn’t it? The hole has closed, and now we’re warming up again—it’s like putting a hat on to preserve body heat. You think maybe the earth put on its own hat by closing the ozone hole? Maybe we need to re-open that hole so polar ice won’t melt. God save the polar bears!

On the energy front: Several Saudi princes have been making large bets on hotels in Central Africa for years now, and I think I know why: a place to escape to when their own people rise up and overthrow the monarchy. The Saudi population is largely young, restless, and in desperate need of opportunity—uneducated and nowhere to go. Also, the oil dependence thing will have been solved, so oil-related jobs will no longer be available. The Middle East will be hip-deep in its own revolt, oil fields will no doubt be damaged, and supply will be severely cut just as our demand has entered its twilight. China, Russia, and the Middle East may join forces and create the world’s first central manufacturing center, combining Chinese steel with Arab and Russian oil. Sand-dwellers will climb down from their camels (so to speak) and take up blue-collar jobs—something they’ve never had before. This working center may spread all the way into Africa, or Africans and Palestinians may migrate over to the Middle East for work. Peace will break out in the region because people will be too busy working to blow anybody up. Prosperity will finally occur in the Muslim world.

Our merger with Canada for their oil sands, and Mexico and Venezuela for their heavy sour crude will pretty much wrap up our oil needs so we won’t have to disturb the deer in Anwar with drilling or intrude on the Utopian splendor in Colorado for coal mining. Mexico and Central America may become our new China for cheap labor-fueled light manufacturing and assembly as China gets regulated and legislated out of our business realm of possibilities. Prisons and jails here at home will make up our remaining cheap-labor needs.

Oil will reach $100-$120/barrel and stay there before falling in the second half of ’08, and the economic talking heads (Bernanke, Kudlow, etc.) will continue to pull wool over viewer’s eyes with the “no such recession” talk—by the time they acknowledge a recession, we will have reached depression status. These economic commentators are paid to be cheerful and positive, just as others get paid for doom-and-gloom forecasts—it’s what brings ratings. DON’T FORGET THAT!

I’m on nobody’s payroll—getting paid would ruin my tax strategy.

After the Beijing Olympics come and go, ethanol will become a passing fancy, as will the whole global warming thing. Hopefully, nuke plants will finally be making a comeback, in spite of the shrill cry of NIMBYs. We will be pretty much rerunning the same energy moves we made since the last oil crisis of the 70’s (higher CAFÉ standards, even more efficient appliances, realistic-sized LED bulbs, etc.), with the possible emergence of an escape from those bloody catalytic converters! Did you know they rob us of a whopping 10 mpg? Get rid of those, and we wouldn’t have to raise CAFÉ standards!

On the defense front: because China may merge with Russia and the Middle East to create this giant centralized steel manufacturing area, China and Russia may get the navy they’ve been sorely lacking. Meanwhile, our navy will be filled with undereducated incompetents (like it is now), be led by idiots who aren’t fit to pour coffee, and we will have gone from command of the high seas to largely rendered deaf-mute and harmless by our own government’s actions. While all three “oil/steel” countries will have command of the skies with life-sized planes and armament, we will have long since turned ourselves over to the Nintendo generation with toy planes, ships, and tanks on radio control. Good thing we’re leaving those borders open so we have somewhere to run and hide!

On the economic front: At the rate in which jobs are moving away from here, secondary education costs are skyrocketing, both we and Uncle Sam are defaulting on loans and accumulating debt, and foreign countries are buying up and loaning money to our businesses these days, we Americans as a culture may turn into the world’s next generational welfare rats. The U.S. may become just another leisure continent to the rest of the world.

The current housing bubble burst will level off in the second half of 2008 through 2009 (possibly making tiny gains), then dive again in 2010—today’s ARMs are due to reset then. Meanwhile, it’s going to be the used car-buying bonanza people have fantasized about, as more and more people default on their car loans right along with their mortgages. Used hybrids may finally come into reach for many (thanks to those who fell for the whole global warming thing), and ethanol increases in the gas-ethanol mix may be coming to your town soon—along with higher car repair bills for corroded fuel lines. Today’s cars cannot run E-85 without anti-corrosive fuel lines found in today’s flex-fuel cars, but that can be remedied for about $150.

As soon as the Beijing Winter Olympics is over, things should return to a 2004 normal—China’s demand for just about everything should dwindle, freeing up lots of resources for everyone else at much lower prices.

Down the road, more and more married working women will find that the new tax picture is just not feasible, and leave the work force in droves—they too will find out that staying home to raise kids and keep the home will pay more in tax benefits than that job ever did, and society will thank them for producing intelligent, respectful kids in return. We will slowly make the descent back into 50’s-style living with modern trappings. Kids will stay home until their mid-20’s or early-30’s due to wages, taxes, and the unaffordability of just about everything. People will be buying duplexes (or apartments) and renting out the extra unit(s) until the kids can handle rent (to get rid of the kids earlier). This will be the new family housing scheme (and the new ownership society), because nobody will be able to afford their own single-family homes after about 2015 unless they’re rich. The housing market may never return to the heady days of 2005-2006, because nobody will qualify for a mortgage due to the new tax burden.

I will leave you now, as I see we’ve reached my destination.